Photo by Amy Irvin/38 Photography

Photo by Amy Irvin/38 Photography

A Simple Flyers Coaching Proposal

Photo by Amy Irvin/38 Photography

Photo by Amy Irvin/38 Photography

We all know Craig Berube’s job as head coach of the craptastic Philadelphia Flyers is a tenuous one. Scott Hartnell noted Berube as a key reason for his departure from Old City. He’s making weird, seemingly random scratches and lineup decisions. Yet, firing a coach during a season is a jarring decision. Sometimes, teams can rally behind it, such as last season’s Flyers. Sometimes, they fall further into despair, finding themselves as key players in the draft lottery. When the team rallies, it makes the interim coach look like a longer-term solution than he really is. Should Hextall take a chance on an interim coach, or ride out the season with Craig Berube making all sorts of crazy decisions?

There’s a solution here, and it’s a little off of the beaten path. Listen up Hexy, because I have the answer to all of your problems right here. The Flyers are well known for giving former players jobs. They also love to celebrate the old guard to put some butts in the seats. So why not simply cycle various Flyer alumni behind the bench for the remainder of the season?

Here’s my proposed coaching schedule:

January: Keith Primeau

Keith Primeau is still in the area, he’s a cool dude, and he looks good in a suit. Number 25 might not be getting into the Flyers Hall of Fame just yet, but he’d draw some fans grateful for his kickass defense from a decade ago. Start the new year off with Primes 25.

February: Chris Therien

Bundy is currently broadcasting between the benches for Comcast Sportsnet, but why can’t he coach the team while he’s down there? It’s a win for CSN, who gets the first game-length live stream from the team’s coach, and a win for the Flyers, who get to conduct a weird experiment that the morbidly curious will tune in for.

March: Bernie Parent

Sure, this will distract Bernie from his usual job of flirting with women and smoking cigars, but seeing the best goaltender in team history coaching the Flyers would be magnificent. Just imagine the oddball postgame press conferences! It’s a beautiful thing.

April: Ed Snider

Not quite alumni, but Mr. Snider has been with the team since the beginning. He’s been called the Jerry Jones of hockey before, but Snider doesn’t get to prowl around a sideline in hockey. Finally, Ed Snider can be seen scowling for a full 60 minutes as the Flyers get trounced by the Carolina Hurricanes’ backup goalie. The only worry with this approach is once Snider gets such direct control of the team, will he ever give it up? On second thought, maybe the gig should go to Donald Brashear or something.